Monday, April 18, 2011

Is there a part of me which doesnt want me to change ??????

Well what I am about to share is my own personal experience,if anyone can relate with it,do comment !!!!

There is a part inside me which loves my stammer and it feels good when I think about it including all the plans and stuff which I will supposedly take to improve myself.It feels satisfied when I constantly brood !!! But it feels threatened when I actually start taking steps like doing meditation or speech techniques !!! It does everything it can to stop me from taking corrective measures.It actually feels good when I get frustrated due to my stutter . And whenever I go against it with a strong will,it goes in silent mode for a few days and keeps waiting for that weak moment when it can again somehow persuade me to stop my practice by giving me millions of reasons like-"I think you should look for some other technique,Oh cmon just another movie then you can practice,are u kidding me its the cricket world cup you cant practice,you need to complete your sleep practice can wait !!!! "
And more often than not,this part of me is able to successfully persuade me.So the question is,what can I do ?????? I Have tried to go against it,but  after a few days it inevitably wins !!!

 I guess I should make this part my friend and try to persuade it that it shouldnt necessarily cling to my stammer and allow me to do what is necessary and actually help me in my endeavor.I should not push it aside but accept this part and try to make it help me,I dont know if it will work or not but one thing that I sure shot know is that fighting it is not gonna help me whatsoever.I also believe that this part is present in every pws,if you disagree just take a moment and think how much time you waste thinking about your stammer compared to the time spent in taking corrective action !!!!! Well ,if anyone has something to share even remotely related to this,do comment,it might help me and other pws !!!! See ya !!!!

2 comments:

  1. I agree with you dhruv....
    from last 2-3 weeks,i don't know ,why i stop practicing the speech tecniques..
    nd now i can realise that my all improvement in speech has got vanished..i'm returned to my old stammering pattern...i'm frustrated and hopeless...what should i do..??

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  2. I kinda of get it now that I am just clinging on to the lazy thought and also on the brooding thoughts while they are just a part of my day dreaming,I know what needs to be done once I get past these thoughts I know what steps are to be taken but my security of my usual behaviour prevents me from making radical changes when in reality they are just a few of a million thoughts I have during the day,I just cling on to these thoughts thats the problem,thnx sachin Sir And JP Sir(From TISA)

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